Troubling times

I'd make a post about God's undying love. But i'd be a hypocrite to write like everything is good when it's not.

There's been something stuck in my mind for a while. Something annoying. I pray about it, but I can't seem to get a response. I believe that prayer does work, it's just that im just about one of the most impatient people in the world. Heck I even hate to wait for youtube videos to load. Maybe God is saying "wait, it's not time yet, but it'll be worth it." It's so hard to wait. Especially with the people all around me. It's not you God, it's me at fault.

I'd have to say, college isn't for me. I can't get through a regular day without thinking about how bad people are. This is only college too, there's much worse people out there. But I can't help but cringe in my mind when someone curses, or all that people live for are parties with alchohol and clubbing. This isn't the place for me. I need a place where people live for more. A place where people know their purpose and their plans, not people who just waste away their lives. I've yet to meet anyone like me here, or even close. Everyone curses, everyone parties, everyone lives in the world and pushes away the things that really matter in the world. It's difficult, a good time to the typical college student is getting drunk or partying. My options are limited. The music I hear around me is always about sex,drugs,money,fame.

What about the simpler things in life that are so much better?

This really is a test, so God, may I tear it up and pass it like Job did when you tested him.

Lately I've been reluctant to go to church, or should I say, youth group. Not because of the actual church part, but because of the people. I'm sorta getting sick of some annoying people. One little girl who thinks she's older than she is, another girl who tries to get all the attention, and yada yada yada. I should really start devoting more time to EM shouldn't I? afterall I am the praise leader. I'm gonna pray a little longer tonight, I feel like I need to pray.

Happy birthday little brother. We've been side to side since the beginning, but now it seems like we've been drifting apart. Wish I could be a better brother; but hey, even when it doesn't seem like it, I got you.

There is this man named Job in the Bible. He's blameless, does everything good, and fears God (in a good way). But one day satan comes up to God and says that Job is at fault, that he's not really a follower God, all it takes a one little test or hardship and he'll fall away. So in order to prove satan wrong, God takes away all of Job's thousands of animals, then kills all his children. But Job, didn't curse God, he was still faithful. He took off his clothes, went on his knees, and said "naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I shall leave." Still satan thought Job could be broken, so to prove him wrong again God makes him have horrible skin disease. At this point Job is suffering like no other. You think you've had it hard when you break up with your gf/bf? or have 5 tests the next day? Job friggin lost all his riches, animals, kids, pretty much his life. Even his wife said curse God, why do you still praise him? But Job responds and call her foolish. He still loves God for all that he is.

That's the way I want to be.

God, make me make you my everything.